Finding Horse Life Balance

Balance is something that has been brought to the forefront of my thoughts this year. Specifically balance in my horse life. The last few years most of my horse life activity has revolved around showing horses. I absolutely love going to horse shows and showing our horses. I have a competitive drive and I naturally want to do well in placings as well as see progress in performance at each show. This year, however, I have felt more stress about shows and general burnout. I have done a lot of soul searching the past few months to figure out why the downward turn in my morale.

I came to the realization that practice and training for the show ring felt like a second job. My primary horse life focus has become work-train-track progress then rinse and repeat. While my competitive drive and focus is highly beneficial to reaching goals, it also risks burnout. Bringing two horses along at the same time is a lot of work and time. It is super rewarding, but also stressful and exhausting at times. Whiskey, my now three-year-old, had significantly regressed after a spectacular end to the show season last fall which was totally disheartening. River was not performing in hand at the same level either. I had become very impatient and hurried with both horses. I wasn’t doing either of them any favors with my hurried, grinding, and impatient attitude. I didn’t even realize I had slid back into hurry and impatience until I went to a clinic with my friend and mentor, Butch Mowdy at Equine Kindergarten, in late April. Whiskey had spent 60 days in Equine Kindergarten with Butch the prior summer. Under his patient coaching and expert handling of Whiskey that afternoon, I made progress in getting Whiskey back to where he should be. Butch's honest assessment that I had become too hurried and impatient was correct. I knew it was the result of my current low morale.

I came to the realization that practice and training for the show ring felt like a second job.

What to do? I had already been considering giving Whiskey this year off from showing. I went back and forth on that decision every week for over a month. Was I doing the right thing? Would it have a negative impact on him in the long run? I had a big case of FOMO (fear of missing out) going on with Whiskey. On the other hand, River and I are in our second show season and still working on becoming a team. We are also competing in events that were completely new to him when I started showing him last year. Since River is older and my only driving horse at this time, would it be better to have him be my primary focus this show season?  

As you can see, I had a lot of questions swirling in my mind regarding this show season. I also knew that the downturn in my attitude was not just about which horse to show or not show. There was something else. In my competitive focus, I had neglected fun. I didn’t allow much time for just hanging out and coexisting with the horses or doing an activity just for fun and not making it a training session. I have been talking about doing a trail drive or just hanging out with the horses, but I hadn’t made time for any of those activities.​

I struggled because there was no right or wrong choice, only a decision to be made.

​So, what did I do? I struggled because there was no right or wrong choice, only a decision to be made. I’m sure I drove my husband crazy with my overthinking and changing my mind. I also sought advice from my friend and trainer/coach, Maria Redinger at Red Dot Ranch, about my situation. She validated what I knew was the best decision, and reminded me that it is ok to scale back or even step away from the show ring if I wanted to. After all that, I decided to concentrate on showing River this year. Whiskey will still be worked with, but there will be less stress at shows since I won’t be switching back and forth between the two. Most importantly, though, I am putting fun activities with all four horses back on the weekly schedule. Whether it’s just a grooming session, a walk about, messing around on obstacles, trying out a new activity like liberty or driving for fun, I will be making these activities as much of a priority as practice and training. 
 
Does this resonate with you? If so, leave a comment below and tell me how you’re tackling this dilemma.